/dev/null

Thai Spirituality

mark@devnull.co.uk — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 14:35:41 GMT

Something I wrote for the Chelmsford Moot:

As most of you know, we visited Thailand in April. One of the things we wanted to do is to see what we could learn and what knowledge we can take back with us.

Before we visited we read about Thailand: according to the CIA World Factbook Thailand is 94.6% Buddhist, mostly Theravada. So before we went we planned to do a talk on Theravada Buddhism. Upon arrival one of the first things we learnt was that it's not as simple as the statistics made out.

The first signs of the Thai spiritual nature was when were being driven down the expressway to where we were staying: we passed many small shrines by the side of the road and in front of most buildings. We discovered that before Buddhism arrived in Thailand, the Thais practised animism, or spirit worship. The practice and beliefs still go on with such things as building spirit houses. The belief is that everything and everywhere has a spirit, so to appease the spirits and to give displaced spirits a new home these houses are built. The spirit houses are meant to be kept out of the shade of the building, and should be more ornate and grander then the house accompanying it, so the spirits will prefer the spirit house instead of causing mischief in the 'human' house. The grander the building the grander the shrine, some for the big shopping centres are almost as big as a small flat! Sometimes almost as much planning goes into the spirit house then the main building. A Brahman (Hindu) priest is consulted and the correct day, time, location and most importantly which spirit is decided. Even the colour of the spirit house is based upon the owners birthday. The spirit houses have space in front to give regular offerings, jasmine garlands, incense and food are popular. It is believed that if you don't satisfy the spirits disaster will occur. Not just buildings have spirit houses, there are spirits for agriculture, roads and other endeavours. There is a spirit dedicated to rice fields, most farmers will create a shrine to ensure a good crop.

One example is one of the most famous spirit house in Bangkok, the Erawan Shrine. Located in one of the busiest parts of the city, at a major road and rail intersection, next to a major hotel and several shopping centres. It's an oasis of spirituality in a busy urban setting. It was believed that the foundations for the Erawan Hotel were laid on a day that displeased the spirits. There were numerous mishaps during construction including some serious injuries to workers. A priest advised the government to build the shrine and dedicate it to Phra Phrom. a Thai representation of Brahma. Once the shrine was complete the construction went with no further mishaps. Brahma is a Hindu creator god: who created the world, heaven and man. The figure is also known as the four faces Buddha, although according to Buddhist texts Phra Phrom is a deva, a class of god not a Buddha. Phra Phrom has four faces which represent kindness, mercy, sympathy and impartiality. This links in with the instruction of the Buddhist Dhama. The image of Phra Phrom has eight attributes:

Disc: A solar symbol and also a long-range weapon to destroy evil
Sceptres: Authority and protection of universal law
Water pot: Creation of life
Empty hand placed flat on the chest: Compassion
Spoon: A sacrificial tool, symbolising that Brahma is a god of sacrifice
Book (Vedas): Knowledge, wisdom
Conch shell: Space; when used as a battle horn a weapon against demons
Prayer beads: Time and spiritual nature

One distinct difference between Phra Phrom and the standard Hindu image of Brahma is that Phra Phrom has eight arms as opposed to the normal four, and carries the Disc and Conch Shell, which are traditionally associated with Vishnu.

I found this site particularity moving and powerful. It's an actively used site that's given a lot of devotion. Most Thai's will ‘wai’ the shrine as they pass, drivers will often take both hands off the wheel to do so! The evening of one of the days that there were political problems in Thailand, Michelle and I visited the site to give offerings and to pray for a resolution. When the next day the Red Coats decided to call off the protests, we returned and Michelle gave an offering of freeing birds and I commissioned an offering of eight Thai Dancers.

Even though Buddhism is the state religion in Thailand, Brahmanism is interwoven. Most royal ceremonies include Brahmist as well as Buddhist elements.

Until relativity modern times: Thai children would have their hair in a top knot, to be cut at a coming of age ceremony, which is a Bramist tradition. Unfortunately western influences and modernisation are culminating with this ancient tradition dying out.

As mentioned earlier, the main religion in Thailand is Buddhism, primarily Theravada which means the ancient way or way of the elders. It is claimed by practicioners that it is the closest form to early Buddhism. Unlike many religions, lay people can become a monk for a short period of time so many men in Thailand have had time as a Buddist monk. Some will say that you're not a man unless you've been ordained, and many fathers will not allow their daughter to be married to someone who has not been a monk. The usual length of time for a short term monkhood is three months, but some are shorter and many are longer. Even King Bhumibol, the king of Thailand had a fifteen day monkhood after the death of his Grandmother.

Important to Theravada is the four noble truths:

Dukkha दुक्ख - Life is suffering. Dukkha can't be exactly translated into English but most people seam to agree on suffering, the concept covers everything from a feeling of uneasyness or unsettled, to the pain of death and grief.
Samudaya समुदय - Suffering comes from desire
Nirodha निरोध - Suffering can be removed by removing desire
Mārgaḥ मार्ग - The way to remove suffering though the eightfold path

The eightfold path is broken into three sections: wisdom, ethical conduct and mental development.

Under wisdom is right view and right intention.

Right view is about recognising and accepting the four noble truths.
Right intention or Right Thought: is being mindful of your intents and thoughts. Stopping the thoughts that cause suffering. Buddism recognise 15 defilements that you ought to remove: greed, ill-will, hostility, denigration, dominance, envy, jealousy, hypocrisy, fraud, obstinacy, presumption, conceit, arrogance, vanity and negligence. One way to help do this is at the end of the day look back at what you did and thought. Did you think something bad about someone that you shouldn't? Once you start to identify these thoughts and emotions, you can begin to remove them as they only serve to do yourself harm.

Under ethical conduct is right speech, right actions, right livelihood

Right Speech is recognising the power that words have to harm, yourself and the recipient of them. The Lord Buddha said that the words you say should fit in the following four categories. Words of honesty, words of wisdom, words that are nurturing and words that are worthy. Anything else should not be said.
Right Actions Doing what is right, it is often hard to know what is the right thing to do. You must bear in mind that when following the eightfold path the aim is to end suffering by the removal of desire. All actions have consequences and that everything in the past, present and future is connected. Only by looking deep within can we find what is right. Three rules that Buddha suggests that people conduct their life with are: respect life, earn what you have and control your desire, rather then have desire control you.
Right Livelihood is looking at your lifestyle, are you helping yourselves and others on the path?

Under mental development is right effort, right mindfulness and right concentration.

Right Effort Is after learning about suffering weather you are willing to make the self sacrifice and have the discipline to break from suffering. Ch'onsa Kim says "When we have realized the truth of suffering, and are willing to seek liberation with the same tenacity as a drowning man struggles for a breath, then right effort has been attained."
Right Mindfulness Instead of just sitting there, think about how you are sitting, your posture and how your body feels. Think about your emotions. Think about what thoughts are passing you by. Think about your state of mind. Approach life with mindfulness and you become aware of the causes of your suffering. One example is when entering the temples in Thailand you must remove your shoes, you can just kick them off and throw them on the rack. Or you can be mindful, carefully removing them and placing them on the rack. Keeping in mind that you are about to enter a sacred site and being open to receive the wisdom you can find within
Right Concentration I'll just give a quote for this one, as I found it explained it better then I was able to. "As we sail through life, the winds of desire push us toward the Ocean of Suffering. But the skillful stand firm in virtue at the helm, directing the rudder of the mind toward peace. Single-minded concentration on the path to Peace (the Eight-Fold path) is right concentration. It is picking yourself up when you stumble and continuing onward. It is recognizing why you have fallen astray. It is recognizing when you are about to fall. It is continuing upon the path without hesitation or doubt. It is never ceasing to develop our skill in the way." Ch'onsa Kim

Even for non Buddhists, I find there is much wisdom in the eightfold path. I think that the world would be a much better place if people were to contemplate the concepts and truths contained within them.

You can see the effects of the eightfold path when spending time in Thailand. For example, the driving in Bangkok is chaos, lane markings mean nothing and traffic is weaving in and out of each other. But you never hear a horn used in anger nor a shout or gesture of annoyance. In fact it is a big socal taboo to argue in public in Thailand and as far as we could ascertain, the language contains no swearwords.

Obviously there is a lot more to the spirituality of Thailand and of Buddhism and I have still a lot more to learn. Hopefully this has provided some insight into the spiritual ways and some lessons we can learn from the Thais.

W

mark@devnull.co.uk — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 10:59:46 GMT

http://trail.motionbased.com/trail/invitation/dashboard.mb?episodePk.pkValue=7808109

Something I wrote to myself last night...

mark@devnull.co.uk — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 21:07:20 GMT

It's crazy every hair on my body thingles, the slightest touch makes my eyes open wide. My senses are on fire and I connect to the universe. I feel all the love in the world, I feel all the pain. Believe it or not there is more love. There is so much love. Even better I feel those who love me and it's so strong, so heady. It looks beautiful and I send mine back to those I love and to the world. Glad the drugs are keeping the rest at bay.

an update

mark@devnull.co.uk — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 12:02:06 GMT

An update, last time I left you it was Tuesday. Not a particularly good Tuesday at that but hopeful.
Well to be honest I was silly, thought I didn't need any breaks or anything like that. I needed to work and I needed to work hard, needed to feel useful I think. So that involved me skipping lunch, staying three quarters of an hour late and not having any thing to eat or drink. Didn't think I needed it.
Well felt a bit light headed by the end of the working day but nothing too bad. Got home and Michelle read my LJ post, there were a few tears, and a big hug. We both agreed that seeing the doctor was perhaps for the best. It made me feel better, so I ended up feeling I'm worth the effort of drinking and eating.
Tuesday night I didn't sleep much, I think about 3 hours that night.
Wednesday, well I woke up at about five with a huge migraine, couldn't get back to sleep. Ended up in bed most of that day, feeling a shit for not going to work and stupid because I probably caused it myself by not drinking anything yesterday. I had enough of the headache and took a few lemsips, didn't have any other painkillers. Going to be honest, a few meant ten, well I wanted the pain to go, and wasn't worth worrying about damaging myself. Did the trick though. Ended felt really spacey, nausated and was starting to worry a little so I got my arse into work. Got some lovely text from two of my good friends at work, I guess it shows that I'm improving because I thought they were lovely.
I'm glad I went back to work, follwed up on the texts from one of my friends. Well not one of my friends, my best friend. We had a lovely conversation which really helped me, we met in the coffee room and had a little chat and a hug. That couple of minutes really helped. I'm so lucky to have such a lovely wife in Michelle and such a good friend in Clare, started to feel like with those two by my side I can get though it.
That evening we went to get chips, still feeling down but showing signs of hypomania. Chatting loads and loads, talking fast. Thoughts flashing into my head, and fluttering out in an instant.
Saw Michelle's cousin as it was her neices (well couisn once removed but we call her neice) birthday, that was really good in some ways but felt I didn't belong, I should be happy but can't be.
Today - Two hours sleep last night.
Walking to work today, people could hear my thoughts. Everyone was staring at me and they all thought I was crazy. Phoned doctors, doctor called back and we chatted. Feel gutted, I've failed.
Positive though, going to get help. But I'm fucking crazy, I need help... getting referred to community mental heath team... seeing doc them this afternoon, will keep posted.

Twitter

mark@devnull.co.uk — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 13:20:54 GMT

Just thought I'd add another blogging platform to the mix, more regular updates on this one. Twitter

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

Just a ride?

mark@devnull.co.uk — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 11:45:22 GMT

The following is something I wrote for myself about how I've been feeling.
It's pretty raw, could be triggery, and might upset people.
But feel free to read it, I kinda want people to. I was helped by other people talking about how they feel with this illness, and perhaps I can do the same. We're not alone.

Love

Mark

Not sure how to start this, I think this is going to be quite hard to write. I’m not really good at expressing how I feel, due to battling my emotions since I was about eleven I’ve learnt to even hide them from myself. I think it’ll be helpful for me to do so, to try to rationalise how I’ve been feeling.

I’m mainly writing this for myself, but there is the second purpose of trying to explain to those near me what’s going on.

For the last week I’ve been pretty down, well very actually. But I guess I really should start the week before, where I was not quite so down. A little up in fact. I wouldn’t describe it as a mood swing as such, not even to the levels of hypomania. I had been a little up though, oddly enough craving dancing. I want to dance when I’m hypomanic or manic quite often, I guess I’ve found a safe release of my manic energies. Well safe-ish as the places that include dancing include drinking as well, and other people. Well I’m digressing, I’ll save it for later to describe some of the episodes.

Right where was I. Being up last week I. Well yeah I have been a little up. Craving stimulation, wanting to dance, higher libido, colours a little brighter, wanting to be creative but finding everything I do to be so dull. Slightly twitchy, agitated, tingly. Looking like just a list of bullet points I know, but I fear I am quite unable to express it more elegantly. Emotions are so hard to describe, especially emotions that don’t fit quite on the ‘normal’ spectrum. I few small sensory issues, feeling like I’ve had things crawling on me, quite disconcerting, but very mild compared with what it could be like. Been itching away at them, blaming it on the shower gel I’d been using. Because I’d been feeling agitated I’ve been having a small drink in the mornings just to take the edge off. Nothing that’d even take me over drink drive limit even, just a taste, enough to smooth the peak until I get going. Not good. Self medicating the rational mind is saying. Well that’s stopped now. It probably didn’t have much of an effect anyway, since Monday last week I’ve been throwing up each morning at work. Can’t really think of a reason why, not been feeling poorly, normally twice a day for that week, guess it’s been helping with my weight loss though: silver linings and everything.

Friday things changed, mood dropped, well plummeted would be more accurate. Nothing too bad though, all within the realms of coping. Just felt so low it made me feel ill, everything grey, feeling of being doomed. Dinner with a couple of friends helped, because they needed lifts it made me feel like I have a purpose, some useful function. Been very had even during the up stage of the week to see any use for me, so giving people a lift helped. Didn’t really understand why anyone would want to be my friend, it felt like people only associated with me out of pity. I’m a friend that is the second option, when there is nothing better to do, perhaps as an act of charity or something. The other way I’ve been feeling last week was that I was just attention seeking, odd really considering that I wanted to hide how I was feeling. But being an agitated sulky arsehole, well what other reason would explain how I am? Friday was different, oddly the idea that anyone liked me actually hurted me. I wanted to disappear, not exist anymore, the idea that if that happened how much it would hurt people tore me apart. Felt to me that because it’d hurt people if I disappeared therefore me wanting to disappear means that I want to cause hurt to the people who would be obliged to be upset. What a bastard I am for wanting to hurt people so much. I felt everything I did hurted someone or something. I felt my existence was a blight on the earth and I don’t deserve to exist.

Friday night was a bit hard to sleep, creepy crawlies turned into snakes, started to be able to see them. Didn’t want to sleep but was tired, didn’t want to hug Michelle incase the snakes got her. Felt bad when I woke up in the night as I’d fell asleep and put Michelle at risk.

Upon waking on Saturday I felt as if my heart had been torn out. It’s hard to describe the hurt, mainly because you’d have had to have felt it to know. I’d almost describe it as on a scale of ‘normal’ emotions -10 is really down + 10 is really up. When I lost my Grandad and when Michelle’s Nan died, I’d say that registered as -9, I’d be tempted to say -10, but I know there is worse to come in life. Saturday morning, when I woke up, it felt worse, -12. So much pain, as if there was so much loss and sorrow. Everything in the world was pain, everything I did caused that pain. My chest was tight, the world was a dark evil place and I felt that everything was connected and that it was me. I was the evil in the world, I was the rotten core. I felt I should be disposed of, I really felt if I was to die that all the bad in the world would go. That I owed a duty to the world. There was something that stopped me though, something to me that is more than the world, my wife standing there with nothing but love for me. My family, and my friend. Even though my existence causes them all pain and rots the world, I understood how I’d ruin Michelle’s life if I was to fix the problem. The world came second. This is becoming very hard to write, I’m locked in my server room, hoping no one comes as I’m sitting here crying. I think that’s a good thing, when I cry I get better. As the morning progressed I started to feel better, we were clearing out the shed and I actually was feeling good about myself and things, yay it’s over. No, it was the eye of the storm, I managed to ruin at all, to bring back everything in it’s full rage and horror. I had filled the car, and closed the boot ready to go to the tip, than there was a shower of glass. I had broken the rear windscreen. I was in shock, the light drained out of the world and I saw Michelle horrified. (-5 mood I guess) I asked for a hug, I needed reassurance, felt so bad. Michelle hugged me and uttered the words “This will take me a long time to forgive”. The thoughts I’d been having about my effect on the world were realised, I do cause hurt where ever I go. I had foolishly been thinking that I’ve been protecting Michelle from my evil, but I’ve not. I’ve dragged her into hell. I went off, locked myself in the bathroom, wanted to rid the world of myself but didn’t have the guts, fucking wimp that I am. Came out to Michelle, no I’m not a wimp, I needed to be strong for her. We rowed, I ended up on the floor saying I can’t cope and begging for support. (This is making Michelle sound bad, please don’t think that. Remember that she was in shock, and I’ve been acting funny all week. Michelle is lovely and supportive of me, and puts up with a lot). Well at this point there has only been a couple of times in my life when I’ve felt more pain than this. But I fought trough we, we tarped over the window and took the stuff to the skip.

Sam and Andrew came round for dinner, she was going to help take more stuff to the skip but it closed at 4pm. It was nice, and I think it brought me out of my mood a bit, still hurting inside but managed to hide it. Guess I’m stronger then I think.
That night I really wanted to cut, ended up rubbing my arm sore, even managed to make part bleed. Sleep was funny that night, bad bad dreams, I didn’t think I was dreaming but I must have been.

Sunday I woke up not quite as bad, still very low though, but no where near as bad as Saturday.
I went off to the shops to get stuff, really didn’t want to be alone but didn’t want to ask Michelle to come with me. Got some stuff to remove the mould in the bathroom, sprayed that on the pipes and made sure there were a few squirts on my sore arm. I deserve pain, that’s what I bring to the world, well the world gets far worse from me. Had a photoshoot of a family member’s baby that afternoon, how the hell was I going to cope. I had to ring her to say that we didn’t need a lift as we’re dropping the car off nearby. That terrified me, I had to spend a few minutes psyching myself up, shaking as I hovered my finger over the dial button. Well the afternoon picked up, and the photoshoot went well. I think the beers there helped. We all ended up having dinner afterwards, I was starting to feel quite good and thinking phew it’s all over, I’m picking up again.

Monday morning. Woke up feeling broken again, horrified at having to go to work and see people. Wasn’t too bad though, a bit of drink before leaving to numb me, vomiting when I got in. But I coped. The day seamed to go on forever, I was alone, but surrounded by people. Having to hide it all was wearing me out, I just wanted to cry. I just wanted to die to do everyone a favour. In the afternoon, I ended up picking up again (can you see a pattern?). Was looking forward to getting home, looking forward to seeing my wife and hopefully being cheered up. We needed bread for Michelle’s lunch today, so I nipped into a petrol station to get some, at the checkout I realised I had left my card at home. Felt so stupid. What a stupid thing to do. But thought, hey I’ll pick up the forms for the holiday jabs, trying to give myself something to look forward to.

Got home and had to leave straight away for the shops, didn’t want to be alone. But when I feel like that I don’t think I’m worth anyone’s effort and it’d be really bad of me to ask for some company. Michelle asked if she should come, and I said if you like. Hoping that she would like to join me. Unfortunately she wanted me to tell her what to do, I couldn’t, I’m too low to demand she comes with me. So I left it at “if you like”. On the walk to the shops I posted on twitter about forgetting my card and being alone in the cold. Michelle saw this and thought that the message was referring to the current trip, and I was just outside. So went looking for me. Once again I caused her hurt.

When I got home, I deactivated my facebook account, the people on my page can do without my attention seeking and emo status updates. I’ll hide so I don’t annoy and upset them.

After that I cooked dinner (gave me a purpose again), the evening was quite nice, dinner was enjoyed and we had welsh cakes for dessert. I was still pretty low and hiding in myself quite a bit.
That night in bed I couldn’t sleep again, the creepy crawlies again, no snakes this time. Put on a podcast for Michelle, Stephen Fry talking about language. Then I realised, I’m not alone am I?

I thought, hey I’ll see if there is any podcasts about bipolar, well there is. There is a few. It made me feel like I’m allowed to feel like I do. It’s chemical, it’s genetic. It’s not my fault. It doens’t excuse anything I do, I have a saying “It may be a reason, but it’s no excuse” to remind myself I can’t hide behind this illness. But that’s what it is, a dieses an illness. I realised.

Now we’re catching up, this morning. I woke, feeling low again but remembering the realisation of the night before. I’ve decided that if this doesn’t improve by Thursday morning I’m going to go see a doctor. I have to do it, for the people I love. And today I realised, for me as well.
I still feel down, I still hurt, I still want to see my blood outside of my body. But I know it's going to pass, I know I'll get though this. I'm strong!

A me day

mark@devnull.co.uk — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 16:20:33 GMT

It's been a while since I've posted here hasn't it?
Well I guess I've not felt I've had the time or anything of interest to say.
2008 has been a whirl-wind of a year, I'm hoping that 2009 will be just as good, but a little calmer. Doubt it though.

Today I'm off of work because of the Christmas shutdown, but Michelle isn't.
I got up early to make Michelle her lunch and to walk her to the station (http://trail.motionbased.com/trail/activity/7352538)
It was sad waving her off, but I'm kinda glad of some time to myself.
I decided I'd go for a little walk, take some time to reflect on the year passed, to get some exercise and to connect back with nature.

Here's where I went http://trail.motionbased.com/trail/activity/7352539 (and being typical geek it even has heart rate data as well)
Photos http://devnulluk.smugmug.com/gallery/6959767_PCNwg
and them both together, which I think is pretty cool http://www.walkingboss.com/trip/view/371
I've relaxed at home for a bit, watched some SG-1 and am going to meet a friend for a pint before getting Michelle from the station. I feel a little bad that I've not got any housework done, but feel really good that I took the time today to find myself again. I'll have to make up with the housework tonight, as I want Michelle to be able to relax after her days working.

Testing Facebook

mark@devnull.co.uk — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 09:28:27 GMT

Testing hello, can you see me facebook people?

Been playing with my camera again

mark@devnull.co.uk — Sun, 14 Oct 2007 20:25:10 GMT

mmm cake

mark@devnull.co.uk — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 20:29:33 GMT

MOT

mark@devnull.co.uk — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 14:47:52 GMT

It passed! Yay!

Chaos Magic

mark@devnull.co.uk — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 10:48:46 GMT

Intresting article I found and thought I'd share
http://www.witchvox.com/va/dt_va.html?a=usil&c=trads&id=11184

hmmmm....

mark@devnull.co.uk — Fri, 14 Sep 2007 17:51:12 GMT

1. Go to http://www.careercruising.com/.
2. Put in Username: nycareers, Password: landmark.
3. Take their "Career Matchmaker" questions.
4. Post the top ten results

1.	Concrete Mason
2.	Roofer
3.	Farm Equipment Mechanic
4.	Arborist
5.	Heavy Equipment Mechanic
6.	Race Car Mechanic
7.	Aircraft Mechanic
8.	Automobile Mechanic
9.	Motorcycle Mechanic
10.	Diesel Mechanic

Here be photos

mark@devnull.co.uk — Sat, 08 Sep 2007 17:25:24 GMT

Right here be photos... Day two of the Paris trip (I didn't use my camera the first day)...

http://devnulluk.smugmug.com/gallery/3441219/5/193091179

Mercian Gathering Photo Whoreage & Video Whoreage

mark@devnull.co.uk — Sun, 02 Sep 2007 23:56:15 GMT

Not my best work I have to admit, but photos to remind of a great weekend amongst old and new friends...

and now the linkys....

Photos: http://devnulluk.smugmug.com/gallery/3408788

Video:

Photo Whoreage

mark@devnull.co.uk — Thu, 30 Aug 2007 23:08:40 GMT

http://devnulluk.smugmug.com/gallery/3377005

mark@devnull.co.uk — Mon, 27 Aug 2007 14:37:17 GMT

‫‬‭‮‪‫‬‭‮҉hello there

VNV Nation

mark@devnull.co.uk — Wed, 22 Aug 2007 18:47:01 GMT

Yay! Booked tickets to see VNV Nation at Electrowerkz (the venue for Slimelight) in December... yippie yippie yay!

Slap the Monk, eh?

mark@devnull.co.uk — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 20:36:56 GMT

"I don’t think I have to tell you that Tibetan monks have enough trouble already. They sit around all day in their bathrobes chanting whatever the Tibetan words are for “I wish I had Internet, I wish I had Internet.” That has to get boring after a few decades."

http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/the_dilbert_blog/2007/08/slap-the-monk-e.html

Photo pimping - Stars

mark@devnull.co.uk — Tue, 14 Aug 2007 19:57:21 GMT

http://devnulluk.smugmug.com/gallery/3293576

#1 Crush - Garbage

mark@devnull.co.uk — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 21:56:13 GMT

#1 Crush - Garbage
I would die for you
I would die for you
I've been dying just to feel you by my side, to know that you're mine

I would cry for you
I would cry for you
I will wash away your pain with all my tears, I'm drowning on fear

I will pray for you
I will pray for you,
I will sell my soul for something pure and true, someone like you

See your face every place that I walk in
Hear your voice every time that I'm talkin'
You will believe in me, and I will never be ignored

I will burn for you
Feel pain for you
I will twist the knife and bleed my aching heart, and tear it apart

I will lie for you
Beg and steal for you
I will crawl on hands and knees until you see, you're just like me

Violate all the love that I'm missin'
Throw away all the pain that I'm livin'
You will believe in me, and I can never be ignored

I would die for you
I would kill for you
I will steal for you
I'd do time for you
I will wait for you
I'd make room for you
I'd sink ships for you,
Take the cross for you
To be a part of you
Because I believe in you
I believe in you
I would die for you

Zootime adventures (with obligatory photo whoreage)

mark@devnull.co.uk — Sun, 05 Aug 2007 21:59:36 GMT

Had a great day today. thethingwizardwanted to visit her adopted Lemur, Little Dave and invited nixie_fairy and myself along for the trip. nixie_fairy had been wanting to take out her 6 year old cousin for a while, so we thought this was an ideal opportunity and took her along for a day out.

The sun was shining (which made the photos hard work), spirits were high, and a good time was had by all.

Thanks thethingwizardfor inviting us :-)

ohhh and photo whoreage time

http://devnulluk.smugmug.com/gallery/3262621

Lammas Blessings

mark@devnull.co.uk — Tue, 31 Jul 2007 08:20:35 GMT

Hope everyone has a wonderful Lammas

http://devnulluk.smugmug.com/gallery/3233585

Sysadmin Day

mark@devnull.co.uk — Fri, 27 Jul 2007 15:47:01 GMT

yay it's sysadmin day... everyone be nice to me

Goth reverend runs unique service

mark@devnull.co.uk — Fri, 27 Jul 2007 12:02:30 GMT

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/cambridgeshire/4625430.stm